Stinky, Stinky

I came out to my car this morning to take McKenna to school and it smelt awful! It smelt like bad movie popcorn butter, which is strange. I haven't popped popcorn in my van lately. I asked McKenna if she had any drinks in the back that might have gone bad. Nope, just bottled water.

After suffering the ride to school and back with the windows down, I cleaned out the van. I found old bags of popcorn from our last drive-in night. They did not smell. I found several grape juice boxes, all empty and all not smelly. Finally I found a McDonalds chocolate milk from five days ago. It was tucked under my seat. The nasty smell was located. Just for good measure I cleaned out the rest of the car and expected the problem to be solved.

Leaving to pick McKenna up from school this afternoon I found the same nasty stench. Evan dramatically held is nose and insisted that I change Alana's diaper. I had to tell him several times she was not what was stinky. Upon further investigation I discovered that the chocolate milk had leaked all over the rug. That is the stinky culprit.

Tomorrow I wash the carpets.

Happy Birthday McKenna!

My baby is now 7-years-old. We had an amazing day, full of behaving, happy kids. It could not have gone better.

The girls were up at 6:45am (Don't they know what Saturdays are for...sleeping in!) - excited for the day. I made McKenna blueberry muffins for her b-day breakfast; her favorite. After a bit of cartoons we loaded the family up and went to the gym. Our gym has a fantastic kids program and the older two went to a kids' Zumba class while Ryan and I went running. McKenna loved it. I think that will be a regular Saturday morning activity.

Once we got home she couldn't wait to open her presents.  So we got cleaned up, got lunch and proceeded with the good stuff. First she opened a book from Aunt Rose, and then a journal from me. The rest of her presents all went together, so we walked her into our room where they were displayed on the bed. I got a good shot of her reaction when she saw her new electric guitar. She has been asking for a guitar for about two years now. I finally figured that if she hasn't lost interest by now it might be worth investing in this. Ryan and I have always wanted to learn to play ourselves so it's a win for all of us. She got the works, plus a couple of learn-how-to-play books from Grandma. Ryan and I want to get her into private lessons but that will take a while. In the mean time we are going to work with her and learn together.

After that excitement we picked up McKenna's two  friends Haylee and Alina. We took them all to Chucky Cheese. We go there once a year around the time of the older kids' birthdays. It was fantastic! I bought enough tokens to run them around for 3 hours. There was pizza and cake as well, but they played a lot of games. Everyone had so much fun.  It could not have been a more perfect day.  

Happy Birthday my sweet baby. I love you so much!!

Cup Cakes

I spent part of my morning making cupcakes. Tomorrow is McKenna's 7th birthday. She wanted to bring cupcakes to school like she has for the past three years. However, the new school has a "no cupcakes in school" rule. After discussing other options with her teacher we decided the I could, in fact, bring the cupcakes. McKenna's class has recess during the last 15 minutes of the school day (weird I know). They go straight from the playground to parents' car so we decided to get rebellious and do cupcakes at recess. McKenna was very excited about the change of plan.

She was the hit of the playground and everyone wanted to sit next to her. I never feared that she wouldn't make any friends but I didn't expect her to become so popular this quickly (cupcakes probably helped). She had a wonderful day and felt very special.

The Old Black Man

I have a neighbor by the name of Mr. Bradly. He is a nice old man who is very lonely. When we first moved into our apartment he was the only one of our neighbors who welcomed us. He was the only one who even acknowledged us, in fact. He really enjoyed sitting on is front patio and watching the kids play. He would visit with them and give them cookies. My children loved to talk and he loved to listen to them. At first I was cautious, as any mother would be, but I realized quickly that he is just a lonely sweet man.

About a year after we moved here a strong robust Mr. Bradly got really sick. He spent 3 months in the hospital and came home a skinny sick man. It was really sad to see the transformation that happened to him. I had just given birth to Alana and my hands were pretty full, but I still tried to see him once in a while.

Over the last year and a half he as been in and out of the hospital but never gets better, just worse. He lives alone but his mother and sister do come to see him from time to time. They don't come nearly enough. I feel so terrible for him so I try to do what I can. I was taking him dinner for a while until he very nicely told me that he does not like "white people food". I really didn't know what that meant so I asked my good friend (who is black) and she said lots of cornbread, beans and chicken grease (yummy).

I've had some interesting experiences with him and been given some glimpses into southern black culture. One day I was over helping him clean out his pantry when his preacher came a knocking. He was a big round black man that Mr. B calls Santa. He came over to pray so I offered to leave and give them sometime. The preacher looked at me and said "Madam do you believe in our Lord Jesus Christ" Yes. "Then you may stay and pray for the health of Mr. Bradly" Ok. At this point he whips out a bottle of oil and crossed Mr. B on the forehead, promptly turns and does the same thing to me. We all hold hands and he begins. Now at this point I am not sure what to do, as this is not how I pray. I look at Mr. B and he is looking up at Preacher with admiration and anticipation.  I bow my head, with anticipation...... It was everything that TV and movies show it is. His voice sang as he spoke and after every sentence Mr B would reply with "yes Lord" or "amen Lord". When is was over Mr. B was crying and Preacher was hugging. I was feeling the spirit. I realized that these two men have as much, if not more, faith than I do. They understand that Jesus Christ is our Savior and that he atoned for our sins. They might not have a complete understanding of the gospel but they have faith and obedience to what they do know. Their religion maybe different and the way they practice it foreign to me, but God loves them and I could feel it in that room. I left that day feeling blessed that I could be a witness to something so wonderful. Something I will never forget.

I don't think Mr. Bradly is long for this world. He talks now of "when he's gone" and I think it will happen before we move. To be honest I hope he does die before we leave in twenty months. I know that he has a place is heaven waiting for him and I also know that once I am gone no one else will be here to look in on him. That would be sadder for me then him passing.

First Day Fantastic

McKenna had an amazing first day! Of course she did. She is amazing. She told me in detail everything they did and then concluded with "This school is pretty much the school of my dreams!"

She made fast friends. There are three white kids (all girls) one Chinese girl and the rest are Hispanic. I am sure a sociologist would find it interesting that the white girls and Chinese girl sat together at the same table. Society has come far and I think each generation becomes less and less prejudice. But when a 2nd grader walks into class for the first time they naturally gravitate toward kids that look like them.

I am so glad she loves it. I can now relax.

School Starts Tomorrow

I have very mixed feelings about this school year starting. 

The first day of school for McKenna is tomorrow. She is dance-around-the-house excited about her new school. I guess I am old enough, with enough experience, to know she should be nervous. She is not. So, I find that I am having anxiety on her behalf. It's not the new kids that I worry so much about. She is still young enough that kids will be nice. I know she will make friend fast. She is pretty good about that. I am nervous because she will be put in new situations and have to figure things out on her own.  For example, she has never eaten in a cafeteria or had to go through a lunch line. She has never been to a P.E., music, or art class. Now, these are the reasons we wanted to move her to this school in the first place so I am very happy. Just a bit nervous. Mostly because I will not be there to help her feel comfortable and see that she does it right. She is at a point now where she gets embarrassed EXTREMELY easy. I just want everything to go smoothly for her.  McKenna is very bright and she learns fast so I am sure that it will all be fine. But, I am a mom so I will worry.

Once the semester starts for Ryan I will essentially be a single mother Monday through Friday. With everything that he has going on I know he will not be around much. When he is at home he will be in the office chained to the computer. I have a feeling that this will be the hardest semester yet. At least for him being able to schedule enough family time.

When Evan starts school on September 7, things will really get crazy for me. He will go to a private preschool about a 15-20 minute drive from our apartment. He is currently enrolled in the MWF class (I have him on the waiting list for Monday-Friday but I am not holding my breath). He only has class from 9-12pm.  That will give me the chance to go to the gym but I don't need to be there for 3 hours. I will end up with a lot of wasted time on my hands between gym and picking him up. I can get my shopping and other running around done, but I don't need to shop three days a week. That's just dangerous. Maybe Alana will let me read a book in the car. Not likely, but I will try.

For the first time in our kids' lives, we have a bit of extra money for extra things. The Army has been a huge blessing that way. McKenna will be starting dance classes. We haven't decided between a tap, ballet, jazz combo or a hip-hop class. I think she will pick hip-hop. I wish I could do both but I think we should start small. Evan will start soccer next week. He will have one practice a week and a game every Saturday morning through October.

I will become a carpool soccer/dance Mom. It's a good thing I like my van so much.

Joyland - Where the fun is

We took our annual trip to the amusement park Joyland. It was hot, of course, and the mosquitoes were out in force. Everyone was very well behaved so we all had a good time.

Evan was tall enough this year to get to ride a whole new selection of rides. In fact he could ride all but two of them so long as he rode with an adult. McKenna was tall enough to ride everything alone so that made the logistics of it all much simpler. Ryan spent most of his time holding Alana and taking pictures. I did most of the rides with the kids. We swapped out when ever there was a spinning, stomach dropping ride, those make me sick.

We bought Alana her own armband in case she wanted to ride the baby rides, but she made it clear that it was not for her. She fussed and cried through the whole carousel. She did manage to ride the cars with McKenna but totally freaked out on the airplanes and I had to have the ride stopped so I could get her out. After that she was done for the night. I think by next year she will be more ready. She was tired and not interested in riding at all but she was really well behaved and just enjoyed watching everything that was going on. There are lots of colors, lights and sounds at the amusement park.


I spent the whole last hour feeing guilty for not remembering to bring the bug spray. I had put it in my bag that morning but then Alana deconstructed the whole thing that afternoon . I failed to put the bug spray back in. Ryan and Evan were eaten alive. McKenna and I got a few as well, but my boys have something in their blood that brings the bugs from miles around to feast. It was awful. Ryan asked if he should go look for some bug spray in the van and I insisted that here was none. I later discovered that I had bug spray in the van the whole time.  
Oh the tragedy of it all.  

Blood Money

This month has been especially hard financially. Ryan was paid $1,200.00 less then what we were expecting. We will get that money in September but that doesn't exactly help the August budget.  As a result we have cleaned out our savings and sworn not to use our credit cards (emergencies only). That still didn't bring us up to our usual monthly budget amount. So to fill the gap Ryan and I have been bleeding for cash.

Plasma donation is a fantastic thing. A lot of parties are involved in the whole system and everyone seems to come out a winner. Ryan and I both donate twice a week. He gets paid a total of $75 for both donations and I get $65. The money is based on how much we weigh and that determines how much they can take. Put that together and it's a nice budget boost. The process takes from 2-3 hours each time, but considering I can read my book, it's not exactly a chore. I don't mind the needles. It hurts for a second but a bit of pain never bothered me.

Of all the months in the year August is the only one when it's even possible for us to donate. Ryan is free, for the most part. He only has clients to see, no work or school. The plasma center does not have a daycare so we can only do this by taking turns going while the other has the kids. Once Ryan is in school we will not be able to donate anymore. He will simply not have the time to either donate or babysit.

Two of our kids have birthdays this month so the extra money is really needed. Can't very well tell the kids there is no money for their presents. Doesn't exactly fly with a 5 and 7 year old. We have also had to buy school clothes and school supplies. This is our first year needing to do that. In the past McKenna has gone to Rise Academy where she wore a uniform and we payed the school $20 and they provide all her supplies. I am realizing now what a fantastic deal that was. She has really had a blast getting to pick out some new clothes and fancy notebooks (not to mention the princess pencils).

Our final guilty pleasure, and yearly tradition, is taking the family to Joyland (going tomorrow). It's the local amusement park. It's not very big and reasonably cheap. The kids have a blast! They spend the whole year looking forward to when we go. I can't possibly give that up because money is tight.

So I will bleed for it.

Impractical but Awesome

I was granted a few hours of leave this afternoon. My mind swirled with the possibilities of what I could do all alone. It really is a radical idea. No kids? No need to hurry home and relieve Ryan so he can work? Just some time for me. So I did something that I have only ever done two other times in my life. I got a pedicure. Seems like a simple thing, but it was oh so good. 


I sat in a chair that massages my back and neck while my feet enjoy a whirlpool tub soak. A woman scrubbed my feet (with a cheese grater, at one point. She was nice enough to point out that my heels were really rough.) and cuts my toe nails. There was a leg and foot massage along with a hot towel wrap for my calves. It was awesome (the word awesome has a high-pitched tone). The hour of pampering ended with the perfect polish and some fancy design on my big toes.


Someday when we "make it" I will do this every month or so. Until then I will look at my pretty toes and remember....Sigh.

Evan is 5 today!!!

My baby boy is 5 years old today and I remember it all as if it was yesterday. I went into labor around 3:00am the morning after Ryan arrived in town. He had been finishing up some work in Rock Springs before joining us in Laramie, Wyoming. My sister Rose was there helping me move into our new house, so she took care of McKenna while Ryan and I went to the hospital. I was two weeks early but had developed preeclampsia due to my blood pressure shooting up.  My parents flew in as soon as we gave them the word and they were both there to witness the birth of their first mutual grandson. Evan was born at 2:15pm and weighed 6lb 11oz. He was perfect.

Evan has spent the majority of his life making us laugh. He is our comedian. He loves to be laughed at. He always has a big smile on his face and lots of hugs and kisses for me. For now, he is still my baby. I know he is very close to not needing me to love on him so much and I will really miss that. Ryan told me once that he soaks up every hug, kiss and cuddle he can get from Evan because there will come a point where boys don't do that with their Dads any longer. As the Mom I don't have to worry about that, but very soon he won't want to sit on my lap to watch a movie. He will just sit by himself.

I have talked before about Evan's ADHD and that he has a stubborn streak about learning. He refuses to learn anything academic from me. I couldn't homeschool him even if I wanted to (I would never in a million years want to do that) because he will tune me out completely. Thankfully he does better in a classroom environment. I am very excited for him to be going to pre-school this year. While he is technically old enough for kindergarten, Ryan and I feel that he needs to be an older kid in his class. The ADHD will be enough of a struggle. I don't want him to suffer socially because he is the youngest and smallest boy. Kids are mean. Studies show that boys who are older in the class tend to do better socially and academically. We also considered that when he graduates high school we would rather he be 3 months from turning 19 and going on a mission than he have a whole year to bum around and get into trouble. 

One thing I know, Evan will be trouble. He's too cute not to be. If he is anything like the men in Ryan's family he will be tall, handsome, have a great body and be funny. Not a good combination to keep the girls from throwing themselves at him, and a teenage boy can only resist for so long. You can bet I will be training him to respect women and not to take advantage of them. 

He wants to be a pizza maker when he grows up. He told me that one day after McKenna announced that she wanted to be a doctor. Evan quite seriously said, "I want to make pizza when I grow up 'cause I LOVE pizza." I told him that would be great so long as he owns the pizza joint.

Evan does bring a tremendous amount of crazy into our home whether it be making me crazy or him acting crazy so we will laugh at him. We all love him so much and I feel so blessed that Evan is a part of our family. I wouldn't trade him for any other boy in the world.

Today we had a family party. Evan chose to have an ice cream cake with tall blue candles. He was allowed to play wii for and extra long time. He loved that. He opened his presents and was very happy with the bounty. Grandma got him the Indiana Jones Lego wii game. He got a couple of books from Aunt Rose. Aunt Becky gave him and McKenna a kickball croquette game. Ryan and I gave him a huge Lego car center and an Ironman toy. Thanks to everyone who sent Evan presents and birthday wishes. 

Comments and Changes

As you can see I have made some changes to my blog look. I think it's good to mix things up once in a while. The biggest change is in the comments department. My husband figured out how to make it so anyone can leave a comment. Wither you have a Google account or not. So feel free to chim in when ever you want. Comments are always welcome and encouraged. Your also welcome to go back to previous post and leave a comment if you were not able to in the past. I will be notified if you do.

This Stage of Our Lives is Complete

It's official - Ryan and I are done having kids.

We did not come to this decision easily, but it wasn't terribly hard either. It was strange the emotions that I felt while trying to figure it all out - confusion, guilt, excitement, relief.

When Ryan and I got married we discussed how many kids we wanted. We easily came to the number four. Not too big and not too small. We wanted two girls and two boys. We even had them named - Mckenna, Evan, Piper and Finn (the naming didn't come until we were actually pregnant with McKenna) As time went on we were blessed with our McKenna and Evan.

McKenna 2.5 years old 2005

I realized a few things about myself after Evan was born. I found that I had limits. Huge change from one child to two. I was overwhelmed and I had a very short temper. I suffered from a bit of postpartum depression and I struggled with body issues from the baby weight. I hated being cooped up in my house and I felt relieved when I discovered that I could send McKenna to half-day Headstart when she turned three. Then I felt guilty for being relieved - but it was also something that she really needed. I knew it would be a while before I would want another baby. I still felt that our family wasn't complete but I was no longer on the "every two years" schedule.

I also learned that I HATE being pregnant. Yes, there is the couple of months in the middle when I feel cute and not sick, but overall it is a miserable process.  Would I do it again if I needed to? Yes, in a heartbeat. The kid at the end is more than worth all the suffering to make it. Notice I said kid.


I don't like babies. Harsh you think, but alas it is true. I loved my kids as babies, don't get me wrong. I took care of them the best I knew how. I loved and cuddled and kissed and joyfully watched them grow. The baby stage is just not my favorite. I remember asking my parents when I was pregnant with McKenna, what stage of childhood was their favorite as parents. My mom answered 0-5. She loved the baby and toddler phase. My Dad answered 8-12. Old enough to do fun things with but still too young to mouth off about it. At this point in my experience I fall in the middle. The perfect age is 4 - still sweet and wants to cuddle me a lot, but independent enough to get their own snacks and wipe their own butt. I guess I like my freedom.

A few months before Evan turned three we decided that it was now or never. We didn't want a huge gap between kids.  If we waited any longer we weren't going to want to start over with the baby stage again. So a year later Alana joined us. Not Piper, but Alana. We don't do trendy names. We had been hearing Piper too much so we went in search of another name.

Evan 6 months 2005

Alana was amazing, beautiful and sweet.  And she slept! The baby thing was totally different with her than it was with the first two. I could easily do this again, or so I thought. Then I came back to reality.  I had my hands full. I was not as overwhelmed as I was after Evan was born, but still really busy. I would have told you we were going to have another baby, right up to the point when it was time to get pregnant again. Then we stopped to have a second look at the situation.

The name Finn has been ruined for us. It became seriously mainstream in the last two years. We no longer wanted to use it, and when that happened the image of another boy in our family started to fade away. It's hard to explain but I couldn't picture having another baby any longer. We even tried other boy names on for size. We liked Jack and Johnathan. But nothing felt the same. Finn was gone. He became the baby that would never be. Sad I know. I would even go as far as to say I mourned for him. But at the same time it felt right. Ryan and I both felt this way.

We discussed all the pros and cons of stopping at three and having one more. There is a lot of them. We talked about it heavily for a few weeks. In the end we were both very sure about the decision to stop at three. We, of course, prayed about it, but never felt any differently.

The pros of having 3 children:
We can afford to give them a good life full of experiences.
We can all fit in a Jeep Wrangler Unlimited (on the shopping list).
I will never have to get fat again.
One more year and I will be done with diapers, FOREVER.
We have only one middle child and he's the only boy.
No more baby stage.
Only one mission and two weddings to pay for.
We can actually afford to help them with college.
If needed we can live in a 3 bedroom home, comfortably.
I can handle all three alone without losing my mind. A good thing since I will be an Army wife.
I will never have to get fat again. Oh, I already said that. :)
I can afford a babysitter without taking advantage of her.
I can volunteer at all my kids' school functions.
I will be able to be a full part of their lives for as long as they will let me. More kids would pull me in too many directions. I can give my all and my best to three. I feel that four would be one over my limit.

Alana 17 months 2010

I love my children so much. I have been blessed three times with healthy, happy babies. My Father in Heaven has trusted me to raise these kids right and I will do everything I can to see that they are taught well and live well. In the end I would rather be able to say I was a really good mother to three kids than a bad mother to four.

Purple Mountain Majesty

Ouray Colorado, a beautiful place full of mountain roads, hiking trails and tourist shops. A fantastic combination and a perfect place for a yearly family gathering. Three years ago my parents invited all their family to meet and camp for a week. It went so fantastically that it has become a yearly event. We have the perfect camping spot that could easily accommodate as many tents as we would ever need and my parents have a port-a-potty delivered for the week. My Mother cooks breakfast for everyone each morning and each family rotates cooking dinner.  Everyone is on their own for lunches. This has been an inspired way of handling the food. One kitchen and one cook leaves all the Moms free to keep track of their kids. On our biggest year we had 18 adults and 12 kids. This year was missing a few key families, so we had 9 kids and 12 adults.

We spent our days doing what we wanted.  There was no pressure to do what everyone else was doing or to stick together at all times. With a group this big it's hard to get everyone moving at the same speed. We tend to break up and do different things each day. I spent the most amount of time with my sisters Rose and Marci. We all have kids the same age so it makes sense to keep the kids together. One day we went on a hike to a nearby ghost town, called Ironton. The kids love to explore the old houses and walk around looking for treasure on the the ground. We had the unfortunate experience of having one of the dogs strut up to the kids holding a barely alive but still wiggling chipmunk in her mouth. A sad lesson on the circle of life. The kids hiked about two-and-a-half miles and really did a fantastic job of it. We stopped for a snack at an old mill house. They looked so cute all lined up that I had to take a picture.

I was lucky enough to go on a quick ride up Brown mountain with my father. It was really beautiful at the top and it got me away from camp and my crazy kids for an hour. I really needed that. I took Alana and had my Dad take a picture of us looking down into the valley where we camp. If you knew where to look you could see it in the picture.

We got to see some beautiful places.  4x4 mountain roads are the best. I feel bad for people to who never get offroad into the middle of things. There is so much you just can't see from the highway. I would have liked to have done more hiking, but McKenna got sick for our last two days and I spent them in camp with her while everyone else went out. I was sad at first, but then I sat in the hammock for 3 hours reading my book and I wasn't sad anymore.

Unfortunately I spent most of the week high-strung and at my limits. Alana was a dream and really surprised me with how independent she was - a bit of a bully but she still left me alone. She loved camping and was more than happy to be left to roam around and get dirty. McKenna played with her cousins nicely and was a huge help to me when I needed her. Evan, on the other hand, was a pain in my behind. Constantly nagging me for something or telling me he was bored and wanted to watch a movie in the van. He never liked the food that was offered so I fought him constantly to eat. I know I was being judged by my family on how I was handling him.  I could see them making comments just out of ear shot. Maybe I was being paranoid but I am pretty sure. I can't blame them, though. I was embarrassed by my short temper. I was embarrassed by Evan's constant whining about everything. In the end I am glad that I took the trip but I was really glad when it was time to go home. It was time to have Ryan's help in dealing with Evan. I was DONE.

Some photos

Thanks to my wonderful sister Elizabeth I have some photos from my week at my parents house to share.

This is how we lined up to shoot.

My dad, Rose and me. Watching the shooting.

Mud bath

Cruising around the fields. Everyone loved this.

Our 4th of July pre-show rainbow. Best I have ever seen!

The seven grandkids. Not an easy bunch to focus and keep happy.

Wyoming Vacation - Day 2

Our second and last day in Rock Springs was equally full of emotion. We started the day by finding the perfect bunch of pink flowers. The only thing that McKenna had on her agenda was to take flowers to her Grandma's grave. This is a very sensitive topic for my girl. She was two-and-a-half when Priscilla past away of cancer. But she remembers.

February 2006 - Ryan was in the middle of the second semester of his junior year in college when we got the call that no one wants to get. It was time to hurry home. We arrived late in the evening to a full, sad house. Ryan held her hand and her last conscious movement was acknowledgement that she knew he was there. We endured lots of extended family and nobody really wanting to talk. Ryan and I spent the night in the living room with Priscilla. McKenna fell asleep on the couch while I was on the chair with Evan (6 months old). Ryan faithfully sat at his Mother's side until she passed in the wee hours of the morning. Adults were woken up and phone calls were made.

The funeral home came and took her very early in the morning.  Only, one of the funeral home workers had a bad back, so Ryan and his brother Mike wound up carrying their mother up the front steps of the house to the hearse.  McKenna was still asleep on the couch. When she woke up the first thing she said was, "Where did Grandma go." That was the hardest question I have ever had to answer in my life. She cried. At two-and-a-half, she understood enough to know that Grandma was not coming back. That is what she remembers, to this day, Grandma there when she went to sleep and gone when she woke up. She will still talk about it and cry. She doesn't understand why Grandma died - that she couldn't live a little longer. She sees that her cousin has another Grandma and she feels a bit cheated. It's a hard thing to grasp for a child, when they don't fully understand the plan of happiness or what eternal families really mean. I knew that this trip to the cemetery would be hard for her. It was something that she needed.

My kids had never been to a cemetery before so there was a lot to talk about and explain. We walked over to Priscilla's marker and I read all the names and dates. We put down our flowers and talked for a minute. Evan was quickly distracted by the grave down the row and he wanted me to read those names. So it went for about twenty minutes. While Evan and I wondered off, McKenna sat there with her head hung, playing with the flowers. When I saw that she was done and walking back to the van, Evan and I met her there. I don't know what she said while sitting there, but I know the she talked to Grandma. She came back carrying one of the three pink roses she picked out. I asked her about it and she simply said that she wanted to keep one of the flowers that she brought her Grandma. She came up with that all alone. It really showed me how grown up my girl is getting. It also showed me that she is not done grieving yet.

The remainder of our last day was spent eating and playing. The kids and I met Stephanie and her girls at the park for four hours of fun and talk. After which, we met at Blaine's for a BBQ and croquette. I met the newest baby Graham, care of Justin (Ryan's younger brother) and his wife Tonya. Beautiful Iliya was a joy to hold. There was laughing and plenty of playful banter. I really enjoyed my trip and seeing my in-laws was truly a pleasure.

For some pictures of that day, and a great description, please see my sister-in-law Stephanie's blog.