It was after school, and I had all three kids with me for an outing of shopping. Generally I try to avoid going to the store right after school/work, but this time it was unavoidable. There is something about a busy parking lot that makes people crazy and inconsiderate.
I had driven up one row and was attempting to drive down the next when the Honda in front of me stopped. She had noticed that the car in the very first space had put on the reverse lights and wanted out. Well Honda was directly behind the car that wanted out. Honda flipped on her blinker (claiming her turf) and sat there. After about 3 minutes she finally figured out that the car was not going to magically remove itself while she waited... in the way. The idiot Honda pulled forward down the aisle, kept her blinker on and put on her reverse lights. She wanted to make sure I knew that she intended to back up into the spot once the car was out.
Because of the diagonal direction the spots were painted in, and the location the Honda was waiting in, the car had to back out going in the wrong direction and into the main road in front of the store. It took a four point turn and more waiting for traffic to stop so the parked car could get out. In the mean time I am stuck watching all this and getting more annoyed by the second. The cars are stacked up behind me and this Honda woman is determined to back up. If I was my husband I would have pulled forward and taken the spot once the car was gone. I was perfectly lined up and in the prime location. But I don't do avoidable confrontation with strangers. Instead I pulled down the row and passed the Honda coming within two inches of touching mirrors and gave her my best "Seriously! You're and idiot" look.
I was most pleased to see that the car behind me pulled into the spot. Idiot Honda honked her horn and had a tantrum in her car. She parked five spaces down - but still got out and ran up to yell at the guy who "took her spot". I proceeded down the row, parked at the end, unloaded all my kids into a cart, and got to the store before those two were done fighting about the spot.
I hate parking lot idiots.
I am so glad I didn't take the spot.
You're dang skippy you would have taken that spot if you were your husband! And then you would have laughed riotously in the woman's face while she screamed. You would have done everything in your power to mock her childish behavior, just to send her hissy fit to ever more cosmic levels. You would have tried to see if sufficiently goaded rage could induce a seizure.
ReplyDeleteBut you're a better person than your husband is.
You are a better person than I am too. Because I am exactly like Ryan. I wish I could have been there instead of you just to punish a purveyor of localized evil.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes fantasize about swooping around the world, exacting fitting sentences (not comic book onomatopoeia such as "thwap!" or "KA-BOOM!" but physical sentences) on petty tyrants like serial rapists, child abusers, and vehicular bullies.
Lazy shoppers who leave the carts by their cars when a shopping cart return rack is nearby, would suffer terribly.
I would like to think that if I had three small children with me I also would have had the presence of mind to spare them the trauma. Otherwise I would certainly have pulled into the spot and gone Muslim on her ass.
ReplyDelete